"Holy holiday home invader with a whisky-soaked beard descending into a still-smouldering fireplace, we've become members of the fairer sex!"

"Does this mean we get paid less?"

>>40760268
>"Does this mean we get paid less?"
I laughed
also they would dress like that regardless of gender shenanigans

"Hey Sam, since we've gone through a strange and apparently magical transformation that science can't exactly explain, does that mean we're going to be experimented on with strange devices and probed in horribly compromising ways?"
"Only in the South, I'm afraid."
"Nuts."
"Not anymore."

>>40760438
What, you mean crossdress?

>>40760547
"Sam, what's a pap-smear?"
"Something a little too close to a first, fourth, and fifth amendment disenfranchisement for comfort, little budette."
"I think you're forgetting something."
"Oh, that's right! The 29th amendment."
"And President Max doth decree - All doctors are to be executed in the most hilariously ironic fashion imaginable."

I DON'T WANT THIS BONER

>>40760394
>>40760668
It's dem hips and dos legs. I bet her ass is bangin toooOOH NO, STOP THINKING THESE THINGS

...I want a season 4, even though I know I shouldn't.

"I guess we'll have to take on more cases to afford all of the apparently necessary female hygiene products, little bu-- er, lady."
"We can save money by signing up for cosmetic testing!"
"Well I am sick of those rats lording their pedicured claws and waxen pelts over me."
"Normally I would make them fight to the death for my amusement, but now I just want to lie about them to their friends."

>>40760268
>>40760547
>>40760702
>>40760958

All of these are great! Keep 'em coming.

"Sam, why do I feel a sudden urge to make snarky remarks and say horribly rude things to people I don't like?"
"Huh?"
"Oh, sorry, I meant 'Why do I feel a sudden urge to make unfunny, boring observations and act really petty in the most unamusing way possible'?"
"We aren't getting paid to make our female fans angry at us via misogynistic humor, Max."
"We ARE getting paid more than them either way though, so why not?"
"Because we AREN'T getting paid more than them anymore. We're women too now."
"Oh yeah...I totally forgot, how stereotypically valley girl of me. Lets go shopping later."
Sam just shakes his head.

The best part is you don't have to change their names.
TellTale, why didn't you do something like this, it's great.

"Sam! I've never realized how filthy our office is! How have we lived like this?"
"Not well."
"I... must... clean it."
"I find your insinuation that all women are compulsive tidiers sexist."
"No, Sam. Women don't live to clean--they clean to live!"
"Well that sounds perfectly reasonable."

>>40760268
>>40760547
>>40760702
>>40760958
>>40761195
>>40761269
This is fantastic. I want this to be an actual thing.

>>40761332
Too direct.

Someone, send this thread to TellTale immediately.

"Hello, chief? Yes? Mhm? Uh huh? I see!"
"What did he say?"
"He thought I was the secretary."

>>40761426
Yeah, just, uh, leave out the boner stuff.

"Sam, where do babies come from?"
"Us."
"Ohhh. Now that crazy, infectious 1980s pop song makes SENSE!"
"What do you mean?"
"We are the world. We are the children."

>>40761453
"Hello? Yes. Uh-huh? Uh-huh? Oh. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah? Yeah?! Yeah! Oh! Yes! Goodbye."
"Was it the commissioner?"
"Yeah."
"New case?"
"No, he thought he was calling a sex line and I didn't have the heart to tell him he had the wrong number."

"Sam, I want to be more open with my emotions and I feel like I can express myself freely without fear of emasculation."
"So?"
"That makes me ANGRY."

"So Max, how is the movie treating you?"
"Leave me alone Saaaam *blows nose* Johnny and Ricardo broke up and I...I...I need more ice cream!"
"You always have had a soft spot for the stuff on the women's television network, but I never emphasized until now."
"RICARDOOOOO."

So who would voice the female Sam and Max?

Also, I assume the names are short for Samantha and Maxine.

>>40762008
Anybody but Tara Strong. Bitch is in everything.

>>40762008
They would be voiced by David Nowlin and Wiliam Kasten.

>>40762212
I would prefer Sam getting a legit different voice while Max keeps his old voice actor.

>>40762244
yessss
Fuck, send this to telltale
Though Tumblr would hate it

>>40760580
would you really put it past them to not?

>>40762008
Sam - Emily Rose (voiced Elena in Uncharted)
Max - Still the same VA

>>40762513
But Max's VA needs to at least ATTEMPT making her voice a bit higher.

"This sucks, Sam. How am I supposed to strike pants-wetting fear into the criminal element looking like this?"
"Putting aside the fact that you don't look all that different, you were never very intimidating, Max."
"But I made up for it with unchecked levels of testosterone and an inherent competitive compulsiveness to measure myself in the suffering of others!"
"You crack me up, little gal pal."

>>40763010
Nah, I have a little more faith in Telltale than that.

Telltale doesn't want to do another Sam and Max anyway, so meh.

>>40763141
FFFFFUCK WALKING DEAD

I DON'T GIVE A FUCK ABOUT ZOMBIES N SHIT

GIVE ME MORE SAM AND MAX

Bump for more. You niggas are good at writing Sam and Max.

But, Max, you don't even like girls.

>>40762925
"Sam, I just realized something."
"What is it, Max?"
"I can do whatever I want and you can't do anything about it."
Sam slaps Max. "I'm a girl too, numbskull."

ALT ENDING

"That's true, I guess we'll have to rely on your innate sense of right and wrong from now on."
"Sam, you don't understand, I live for slapstick."
"Now now, Max, you have to be a responsible young woman now."
"Hurt me, Sam! Hurt meeeee."
"You have issues, which ironically have nothing to do with the implications of what you just said."

>>40763530
I'LL PAY THEM TO MAKE MORE SAM AND MAX

I'LL PAY THEM

IN ASS

>>40762925
>Company that dares to SHOW YOU killing children when every other developer would pussy out.
>Not showing violence to females.

Yeah I'm sure.

>>40763620
AND GRASS?

"Sam, being naked doesn't feel right anymore."
"I blame the patriarchy."
"The Irish hierarchy?"
"Have you seen the way they treat their women?"

>>40763649
NO

Bump

>>40763887
"They're all sickly and green and smell of booze."
"That's just a side effect of being Irish."

>>40760828
no you should
You definitly should.
We all should

Never played one.

Anyone remember the Penal Zone? could we get a female Skunkape?

>>40764533
I'd rather we didn't.

>>40764550
Why? Season 3 was fun.

>>40764593
It was but I still don't want to see a female Skunkape. He's ugly enough as a dude.

...I'M HEARING ALL THE QUOTES IN THEIR VOICES.

IT IS GLORIOUS.

>>40760268
KILL IT WITH FIRE, FAST!!!!

"I think Stinky hates us more than ever, Max."
"He's just jealous because his milkshake doesn't bring all the boys to the yard."
"What does that even mean?"
"I'm not sure. Milkshakes always just made me gassy."

>>40764760
No, no!

Sit it down for a nice candlelit dinner, get some flowers, some soft music...

THEN kill it.

With penis.

>>40764928
Max'd bite your dick off.

>>40765016
As a man and a woman.

W-where does she keep her gun?

I just love that Max is exactly the same except for the bow

You'd think Sam would be more...husky, though

>>40765359
None of your damn business.

>>40765377
She's a collie, sweetie.

>>40763620
Kickstart it?

>>40765377
Everything below her tummy is pretty goddamn thick

Fucking furries.

"It's a tampon's tampon!"
"That's a crowbar, Max."

>>40765592
And that's more than perfect.

>>40766455
My English degree finally paid off!
I have wasted my life.

>People think Tell Tale has control over Sam and Max.
Only Purcelli does, he owns the intellectual rights. Tell-Tale only made the games.

And, thanks to this thread, I just bought the first three seasons on sale.
Will it be 15 dollars well spent? Hopefully.

>>40768122
What if this thread was just one of many viral marketing ploys by TellTale and they just used unused dialogue written for a particularly silly segment from Devil's Playhouse to drum up interest.

>>40768667
Then they're quite clever and deserve money.

>>40766284
Oh my god I lol'd.

>>40768667
Very sneaky way of trying to get a compliment.

cute ascots
i really do mean their ascots

>>40768122
Totally worth it.

>>40768667
OP here. I wish I worked for TellTale ;_;

"Do you think I can make it onto 'Girls Gone Wild'?"
"I'm afraid your particular brand of debauchery would only result in money-back demands, compensation for mental anguish, and an insanity plee."
"Thanks for believing in me, Sam."

"Gosh, it sure is hard to run in high heels."
"You've always trouble running, Sam. The heels just give you a valid excuse."

>>40760268
I know they were gender swapped but who are they? What did they do? What show?

>>40775150
Sam n Max it's a vidya game.
They're detectives.
I've never played it.

>>40775150
>doesn't know Sam & Max
Educate yourself!

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sam_%26_Max
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XpR-Misimgw

It was a comic, cartoon, and several video games in the 90s and 2000s. They're freelance police. And they're your new favourite characters.

>>40775303
>this is the most fun I've had without being drenched in the blood of my enemies
why can't I hold all my love for max

>>40765377
Max's legs look a little different to me. Can't put my finger on it though.

banang~~~~

>>40775351
Thinner, a bit longer.

Animated series Sam had the best voice.
Hit the Road Max had the best voice.

If only Harvey Atkin and Nick Jameson worked together.

I'd like to see how Flint Paper would react to them turning into chicks.

"Look at us, Max! Do you know what this means?"
"Yeah, time to corner the preteen girl market. My Little Pony can kiss my little a-"
"No, knucklehead. It means we can eat for half-price on Fridays at Stinky's Ladies' Night All-You-Can-Eat Buffet."
"I think you mean All-You-Can-Stomach. How did Stinky come up with that anyway?"
"Court-ordered."
"Ah, right. After the whole 'No Y chromosome, no talking' policy debacle."

Goddamn these are fun to write.

>>40775502
I thought season 3 had great voices.

>>40776896
I think they're all great. Those were just my favourite.

>>40775502
All of Max's voices work, but TellTale's got a little too high pitched in their second season.

>>40777930
That's why I like Hit the Road Max. Wasn't very high-pitched and it had a real mean, thuggish quality to it without being too serious.

>>40760268
Sam and Max are still valid! Hooray for gender neutrality in nicknames!

I think keeping the male voices for Rule 63 Sam & Max would be more comedic.

Though that's probably because I've been reading this thread in their voices.

>>40775303
The voices for the game are a lot better.

>>40760268
"We get paid?!"

"Sam! You've got to see this! It's nine and a half inches of pure heaven!"
"Oh, Jeeze, Max, I really don't want to- Oh. High heels."
"Finally, a fashionable way to both induce puncture wounds, and get onto the roller coaster at Love Land!"
"Oh no. We're not going through that fiasco again.."
"I can't believe you don't see eye to eye with me on this!"
"You're gonna need a whole lot more than nine inch shoes to get eye to eye with me, little buddy."

"At least now you have an excuse for your height and swishy personality."
"Oh yeah? Well, calling you a bitch would just be correct terminology and you've gown down a cup size."

I'm really disappointed they did nothing for their 25

>>40777000
Season 3's voice acting was so fucking bitchin'. David Nowlin was amazing during Sam's more "unstable" moments (Noir-ified in Episode 3, and scared and miserable in Episode 5). But Kid Beyond steals the goddamn show. The Narrator AND Papierwaite? Holy shit, this guy bleeds talent.
Also he's an incredibly badass musician, he sings and beatboxes. Seriously, you gotta check out that shit, it's ridiculously boss.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=egaOjubiQWw
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H4MFE9bfDYg

>>40775303
what are some recommended sam and max comics?
I've read sprinklings of them but mostly just storytimed stuff

>>40779707
Just get Surfin' the Highway. The anniversary edition if you can (a bit more content). It's pretty much all you'll ever need.

>>40779707
Just download the surf the highway comic, they are all there (it's sad but there are not so many s&m stories)

>>40779748
>>40779764
>someone put a mf link of it up yesterday
YESS The gods smile upon me

>>40760547
>"Nuts"
>"Not anymore"
My sides are on Mars.

"Max, now that you're a woman, I fear for your self image."
"Why's that? You think I'm ugly or something?! GOD MADE ME LIKE THIS!"
"No, its just that you don't like girls."

>>40779805
The fuck am I watching?

>>40779858
"Well, now I just don't other girls. Like, you know, other girls.

>>40775502
I really love Telltale's Sam voice, it just clicks better with the character.

>>40760268
Huh... This thread is still up, and what do you know, so is my boner.

I'm ashamed of myself.

"Well little lady, on the bright side, we can just attribute your bad attitude and awful manners to PMS."
"The hell I will. I don't need an excuse to practice my 53 1/2 amendment right to exert my lording personality on people."
"Yeah, but I do when the Russian ambassador is down a few fingers."
"No, it was whole arm."

>>40779936

some one needs to put that pic of jessica rabbit styled Max, it's sure to kill your boner.

>>40765567

If they wanted to make huge amounts of money all they'd need to do is give away another TF2 max head as a promotion item. (For some reason I don't think Gaben would mind making more money)

>this thread has received 3 of 4 requests needed to trigger archival.

Do eeeeeeeeet!

>>40780203
I'm ashamed, yes, but I'm not sure if I even want to kill it anymore.

>>40780286
I concur. Archive this thread.

"Well, Sam, I've finally been impeached."
"So what was the last straw? Your decree that vagrants are legal tender? Suggestively telling the Iranian President that you'd show him your weapon of mass destruction if he showed you his? Your "A Gun for Every Grade-Schooler" initiative?"
"No. They found out I'm a woman."

>>40779664
He sounds like Damon Albarn, just less whiny.

*The following episode, the town looks like it did in Season 1 and 2.*

"What happened to all that dirt and grime?"
"I may be a guy again, Sam, but my inner homemaker just couldn't help herself!"
"Then why is our office still dirty?"
"Even I have standards."

"Hey Sam, what happened to your old gun?"
"Oh, I got an even bigger one to replace it!"
"Now that you're a woman, I can't say that you're compensating for something!"
"Its a win-win! Lets sell the De Soto and buy a Hummer."
"I love not compensating!"

>>40781047
pffff

>>40760268
This kind of 63 I ccan get behind. They actually look like the characters

>>40779654
The games are on sale this weekend if that counts for anything

>>40781487
They're on sale every few months ago, I think I got the whole thing last year's summer sale for $12?

Very much worth it, I'd pay full price for another Sam and Max game

>>40781559
>ago
*or so

I need sleep

>>40781559
I wish I knew about Sam and Max sooner, if only to get the Max head for TF2